How is your anxiety treating you?
Anxiety and mental health, in general, are things that took a long time to be taken seriously and still people have hard to deal with their feelings and emotions.
I personally had to deal with anxiety all my life and it became really hard to contain my emotions. I’m someone that doesn’t like to express my feelings because I’m scared of facing them. So what I do is mute myself, I stay in my bubble, try to contain everything and that builds up over weeks, months, years. And then at some point I’ll get triggered and will get a flow of emotions and feelings I cannot deal with all at once. And that will result into a panic attack.
Now I have found my ways of dealing with my anxiety and I hope it will help.
Firstly you need to figure out why you’re having anxiety. It’s hard sometimes but you need to ask yourself these questions. Why am I feeling this way? What am I actually feeling at the moment? What happened that triggered me? What do I fear? Write it all down, I can’t express this enough but write everything! Even if it’s not sentences, words are fine or if you can’t phrase it and find the words you can draw anything that comes to your mind when asking yourself those questions.
Just let it all out! Once it’s done, read it, face it. If you want to cry, cry it’s okay. You have been through a lot and your body needs to physically evacuate these feelings.
Now that we know what is giving us anxiety, let’s figure out what will work for us personally to calm down and ease the pain.
Talk that talk
You can talk about it with someone, a family member, a friend or a professional that will have an outside vision over the situation. Now be mindful of who you decide to talk to. Nowadays with internet and travel, everything is amplified and sometimes we think we can talk to some people that we consider friends. I personally feel like the concept of friendship has gone lighter, we call strangers our friends. So please, for your own sake, choose wisely who you will be opening up to because your feelings are important. They are important, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! So having someone that truly cares about you and your feelings is important even if they can’t give you any advice, that’s fine. As long as they listen. Because that’s what you need, someone to talk to but mainly someone that will patiently listen and acknowledge your feelings.
When I’m a little bit anxious I know who I can talk to that instantly makes me feel better. And you don’t actually have to talk about your problems or feelings. Sometimes just engaging with someone else instead of locking yourself up with your blurry thoughts, is all you need at that moment. The people I talk to in these moments, have no idea, most of the time, that I’m dealing with anxiety and I just need to interact with someone else.
Something that has helped me immensely is meditation and controlling my breath. Melt downs are easier to cope with breathing techniques and meditation.
So first things first, whatever you’re doing while having that melt down. Stop it right away. Let’s feel what we feel for a minute or two. Heavy breathing, sobbing, crying, our chest feels unbelievably heavy. It hurts, I can’t breathe, what am I going to do, how am I going to get out of this… etc. STOP. That’s enough. Let’s take control over our emotions.
Take a deep breath and breath out. Breath in and breath out heavily at first and then slowly you will feel your heartbeat slowly down. Just focus on your breathing, in and out. You can close your eyes and put one hand on your chest to help you focus on that. What I like to do next is put some meditation music on, relaxing sounds. I have a few playlists that I prepare on YouTube or Spotify. Let me know if you would be interested to see them and I can share them with you.
You are not alone
Remember that what you feel is okay don’t be ashamed but don’t let them take control over you and do not let them define who you are. And you are not alone in this, even if you feel like there’s no way out or there’s no one to talk to. Please reach out for help and here are a few helplines if needed. Click on the picture to be redirected to the official website.